As this is my favourite topic in the world (i.e. religions), I felt like I had to write a bit more about it.
Last time, I focused more on the emotions that I have carried with me throughout the years in relation to my religious upbringing and the evolution of my beliefs.
I probably didn’t mention one very important aspect of my emotional attachment to the world of the sacrum – which was my ex-partner’s religion, and how that shaped my life for years (and certain expectations for how the rest of my life would look like). However, since it might be still too soon to speak about that, I will just say – when you decide to marry someone, you marry their beliefs as well. The stronger they are, the more impact they will have on you and your future family.
However, my life now is currently as far from God as it might be possible without indulging in seven deadly sins on a daily basis.
Pride, greed, wrath, envy, lust, gluttony, and sloth.
And that’s the thing – discouraging people from doing certain things, as dictated by mainstream religions, is very often a quite good idea.
Tell me the last time when envy or greed led you to anything good for you (maybe just save the lust stories for yourself). Not committing those deadly sins may sound like a no-brainer but at the same time – some of them like pride and gluttony you could justify as vices not hurting anyone else.
I personally eat mainly halal-style and I think that not eating pork is actually an excellent idea. The world would be a better place if we had more laws enforcing us to eat less meat in general, I think.
Well, maybe I’m liberal, but definitely not libertarian. This might be my coming out post.
I just believe that, as people, and as a society, we need some structure. I, for one, would give any money for spiritual guidance that I could actually believe in.
One of my weirdly happy childhood memories is about Lent and Easter. I always tried to give something up during Lent to strengthen my willpower and make my life better and, of course, the most mature choice as a 10-year-old me was to give up sweets. 46 days without my favourite things to eat felt like a really long time but it only made me enjoy Easter more. The smell of lilacs, the blooming nature in my tiny village in the Western Poland, the early morning of Easter Sunday mass and the anticipation of pleasure are all interconnected in my memory.
Currently, I think I’m planning to go to a dance festival at Easter, which again, feels very flat in comparison and also quite far from any sacrum.
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In the book ‘Religion for Atheists‘, Alain de Botton argues that if you are already an atheist, there is nothing that prevents you from using the spiritual teachings of religions as you please. He lists the benefits of that such as learning to forgive (something that I, personally, need to work on), expressing gratitude, getting more out of art, or strengthening your will. Your god might be your conscience, and the person you need to appeal to is your higher self.
One thing from de Botton’s thoughts that I found really resonating with me was the lack of a religious calendar in secular life. Certain holidays give you a chance to focus on some aspect of yourself. Doing that just when you ‘feel like it’ in your life has a high risk of postponing it forever. Nobody in your regular life gives you a deadline for learning how to move on from grudges.
Another great thing about religions such as Catholicism (at least in theory) is that they shatter all disguises given to us by money and status. At a catholic mass, you stand before God, surrounded by your community, as when you were born with your soul naked, and your earthly possessions and achievements don’t matter anymore. How much it works in practice probably really varies, but I do believe with my whole heart, that we all need that humble reminder as frequently as possible.
So this year, I’m planning to give something up during Lent that will probably shake me to the core, but ultimately, might be really good for me in a long run. The only person that will assess me will be my stained conscience. Gods demanded sacrifices from us since we heard their voices at the dawn of time and maybe we needed them more than they did.
